movin' on up

The process of moving is never an easy one. Even though I don't have much to move, I find myself feeling overwhelmed by it all. Mainly, I think I'm a little sad to leave this room. I've only been in this house for about 6 months, but I've really enjoyed my time here.

I guess I should explain my current living situation a little better. I'm currently residing in a house with five other people. It's a big house, huge, actually, by most kids our ages standards. It's just a huge house, so the fact that there are six of us all together isn't that bad because theres really enough room for everyone. I've taken to calling the house the Julie St. Mansion because it's just so massive and it's generally the location for most of the parties, BBQ's and events we have in our circle of friends. The current residents include myself, living in the massive attic above the living room, Sam, whose got the master bedroom, Sonia and Derek, sharing the back room behind the kitchen, and Lea in the room next to Sams. Our friend Pat is also currently crashing on our couch while he waits to move down to live with his mom while he recovers from his upcoming knee surgery. So yeah, thats six. we've all had our moments, our temper tantrums and irritations with each other, but for the most part we're all still friends and get along pretty well.

While I'm not going to miss the lines for the bathroom, the cluttered and dirty kitchen, or the fact that I'm never really alone, I will miss the communal sort of living situation we have going on. Lazy days spent watching movies and bad reality television, the impromptu jam sessions, the "family" dinners, that theres always someone dropping by and something going on. I'm sure we'll do all these things at my new casa, but it's just going to be me and Ashley for the most part. A much mellower and quieter atmosphere is what we're both looking for, but I hope we still have people swinging by randomly to just hang out and chat for a while. I'm going to miss coming home to a houseful of people arguing good naturedly over scrabble or monopoly. I'm going to miss being at the center of the little world my friends and I inhabit, but it's also time for me to take a step back from it all for a little while. I need to focus on school and work this winter, and spend more time alone, working on the projects and hobbies I have been putting off. I am excited for this new chapter in my life, if also a little bit sad to be turning the page on the old one. I'm sure I'll still be over here frequently, and I don't think of this really as an ending, so much as a segue into a quieter, more responsible portion of my life.

why i started a blog

There's always been the part of me that wanted to be one of those people who could religiously keep a journal. I wanted to be able to communicate with myself from the past, remind myself of things that shaped me and changed me. I wanted to understand why I did things...to be able to look back and know the connections between events, people, places, moments that had lead me to this point. I wanted to be able to remember things with the vividity and clarity of my own immediate emotional response. I wanted to know, with the unequivocal evidence of a written testament, who I was. I wanted what defined me to be put down in words. And that is part of the reason I blog. A big part, actually. I want this to become a journal, my thoughts and experiences and reminders and images of my life as it grows and changes. I want to read a paragraph and be there, watching the sun set over the lake and smelling the air full of the scent of fall. My fingers cold in my pockets. I want to remember how it felt being young and alive and experiencing something beautiful. I want to remember everything.

But there was always something missing in journaling. I liked being able to go back and look at my thoughts, but it felt...hollow. Like listening to an echo. It was only my own voice shouting back at me. Maybe I've always needed an audience of some sort. And maybe thats why journaling never took with me. It was silent and soulless and would never give me the advice and support and encouragement I needed. I crave communication. I am not the type of person who can sit and talk AT someone, nor am I the type who can sit and be talked at. I want a conversation. I want a dialog, not a monologue. I want to hear different perspectives and ideas and beliefs. I want to understand why I did the things I did, but I also want to understand why other people do the things they do. I want to know who I am, but I also want to know what I could be. What I might be if I were to take this approach or consider this point of view. I want to share myself with others, to give my time and advice and ideas to other people out there in the world and I want to encounter people who startle me. Minds and thoughts and personalities like and unlike me. I want to know what their lives are like, how they differ and relate to mine, where their world and reality and experience has led them. 

Does that make me greedy? I suppose it does. I love my life and who I am, but I am also a little bit voyeuristic in that I love looking into other peoples lives and minds and seeing the world through their eyes. It can be a life I admire and strive for, or it might be one that I would never in my wildest dreams want for myself, but it's the human experience, really. And getting to see that, to watch people grow and change and move forward...and sometimes back...well, I think thats why we become parents. We want to be a witness to the next life. It's why we group together like we do, form friendships and relationships and bonds, because we need witnesses for our own lives and experiences.

So thats why journaling never did it for me. So I still love talking about myself. And yes, I want other people to listen, but I also want to listen to them. A shared experience. Mutual witnesses. I'll listen to your story if you'll listen to mine.

love,

L.

{Blessed to be a Witness::Ben Harper}

praying for thunder

{boots::minnetonka}{jeans::ross}{shirt::ross}{shrug::ross}

The first photo and this last one were taken about an hour after my outfit pics were taken...the sky was doing some amazing stuff with the storm thats been rolling in all day. The weathers put me in an odd mood; restless, slightly melancholy...I always get like this when the weather starts to get cooler. 

I'm praying for thunder. I'm praying for rain.

L.

A Single Man

Sometimes a film is so piercingly sharp that it seems as if it finds a spot in your chest and presses there until you crack. This film was one of those. It leaves you with something new inside of you, a new space through which you suddenly see the world very differently. In his directorial debut, Tom Ford has both lived up to and excelled my expectations. A Single Man is the story of George Falconer (Colin Firth), a gay professor at a university in Los Angeles in 1962. He lives alone, struggling with the loss of his lover of 16 years, who died in a car accident 8 months prior to the film. The film centers around what George intends to be his last day on earth and follows him through the motions of tidying up his life before he ends it.

First of all, Colin Firth is amazing in this role. You fall in love with him from the very first tragic moments to the last, and Falconers grief is palpable in everything he does. But Firth also lends his character a certain amount of joy amidst all the bleakness of preparing for his suicide. Turning what would otherwise be commonplace encounters into something special, as he knows they are the last he will have. 

Secondly, Tom Ford really did a beautiful job on this film. Every shot is extraordinarily beautiful and works to set the tone of the movie. It is a bit reminiscent of glamorous 1960's fashion spreads--the production design is by the same folks who do Mad Men, and well, it's Tom Ford directing--but that may very well be one of the things that makes me love it more. It's beautiful to look at, with gorgeous fashion and set design, but it is heart-wrenchingly so; the color flooding in to show the small pleasures Falconer takes throughout the day, and draining away to reveal his underlying sadness. It also features some really amazing supporting roles; Julianne Moore as Charlie, Falconers lonely, gin-soaked divorcée friend as well as Nicholas Hoult as his student, Kenny. 

All in all, it was a gorgeous film. If you loved An Education or Mad Men, I'd definitely recommend watching this. I know I'll be watching it a few more times in the weeks ahead.

smudged

I am currently sporting the ugliest, most ill-fitting pair of cargo pants ever and a purple, paint smudged Sierra Nevada Brewery t-shirt because I've been trying to take advantage of the warm weather that has finally returned (thank GOD!) and finish a dresser I've been trying to paint/refinish. It's a curbside rescue that was originally this horrible hot pink/salmon-ey color, but I loved the style of it and the number of drawers (nine of 'em). So I got my brother to bring his pickup around and we rescued the little (ok, ginormous) darling and brought her to my house for a little TLC.

To say that this project has been a little consuming is an understatement. I'm not exactly sure what the total cost has been, but it wasn't cheap, and combined with the man hours, it's been about a week long project. But I love the way it's coming along.

So that's why I havn't been doing the outfit post thing. Every morning I wake up around 6:30, throw on my grungies and get to painting...and sanding...and stripping...and staining. I spend most of the day hunched over the dresser and then I shower and head to work, so theres really been no time to look pretty for the blog. But my new improved dresser is starting to look pretty on her own. I'm sure she'll get her own little post, all dressed up in her new outfit. She's gonna look gorgeous.

An idea of the color I was dealing with....

I'm bummed I didn't take before pictures. I only got a couple of the drawers as I was stripping them, but trust me, it was aweful. This color, solid, over everything. Eew. And under that was the faux woodgrain vinyl stuff, in a really bad dark brown. So far I've stripped two coats of paint and all that vinyl off, only to discover that most of the dresser (all the drawers and the top) was particle board! Bummer. But the sides and trim are all a nice blond wood, so I'm in the process of stripping all that down and staining it, then painting the rest this beautiful blue-teal color. It's gonna be rad, just you wait.

lovelove and paint stains,
L.

Man Candy

I wasnt really crazy about the outfit I put together yesterday, so today, instead of an outfit post, I'm doing a post on something that's always been sort of puzzling to me. Menswear. I love men (can you tell I'm single?) and I love men who know how to dress. But shopping for men...well, that's always been a bit difficult for me. I know what I like and I know what I like to see men in, but somehow I've never been very good at shopping for them. In highschool my best friend was this incredibly stylish guy named Lu. Shopping for him was the hardest task I've ever undertaken. I'd stand in the mens section of whatever store I was in and just sift through things in that dazed, befuddled sort of way old people do when their trying to figure out their cell phones. It's not that his taste is particularly expensive or exclusive, I just never knew where to begin. A sweater? A pair of shoes? A tie? Shopping for guys has always been a real struggle for me. I wish I had had one of these extremely stylish gents along with me to help me pick out something for him.

I love men who dress like men. The "lumberjack" hipster look, in my opinion, is like the sexiest man-look ever. That navy sweater the gentlman is wearing above on the right is so perfect. Understated, uncomplicated, with just the right details (the pattern and the collar) to make it interesting.

As much as I love the understated look of a man in jeans and a t-shirt, there is something undeniably sexy about a man in a suit. Don Draper may well have ruined me for life with his skinny ties and perfectly cut suits. The image on the right is from Dolce & Gabbanas recent collection and I love the white-on-white (though I personally know zero guys who would be able to keep it that white). While the guy on the lefts use of color and accessories is probably better than some of the girls I know.

A floral scarf adds a level of interest to the gent on the rights otherwise simple and classic look.

Personally I love the use of the bungee chords as accessories. How unique...and potentially functional if you need to move anything while out looking shmexy. 

Fall Menswear Essentials:

1. Leather :: gloves, jackets, boots...it's manly. it's rugged. it'll keep you toasty warm.

2. Pea Coat/Trench :: adds a dash of sophistication to anything.

3. Chunky Knit Sweaters :: preferably with some sort of interesting detail; a unique neckline, a pattern, unique buttons.

4. Scarves :: when paired with the pea coat/trench they take jeans and a t-shirt up quite a few levels.

5. A Hat :: be it a fedora or pageboy, I don't care. It'll cover yo mop and keep you warm.

Remember guys, it's all in the details. A dash of color here, playfully mixing patterns there and lookit that, your a heartthrob in the making.

Ok, I'm gonna be honest....the majority of this post is just eye candy (I clearly have a "type").

{all photos via :: the sartorialist}

P.S: I have no freakin clue why nothing will align properly, but I just spent 45 minutes just trying to get the photos side by side so I give up. F you Blogger.

autumn leaves beneath frozen soles

Twice in one week! Two outfit posts in one week! Go me!

I'm really happy with the way these photos turned out. I drove up to the area around Fallen Leaf Lake, which is--much like the rest of Tahoe--beautiful. The sun was just going down and I waded through all that prickly grass and into this meadow behind a stand of aspen trees to get these shots. Note: this is not a good idea in tights...or ballet flats. I had so many stickers stuck to my legs by the time I left, but it was worth it. The light was gorgeous and it was so peaceful out there. Not a soul around for miles.

Ashley and I have an interview with a potential landlord tomorrow. I've spoken to her several times on the phone and she seems to like me. The house is so adorable, definatly a throwback to the 70's, but in all the best ways (green shag carpeting in my room!!). It's pretty big and only a couple blocks from the beach and some really great restaurants and it's totally affordable. So, hopefully, after Friday afternoon, Ashley and I will have a new house to move into. Keep your fingers crossed!

{blouse::thrifted}{leather skirt::thrifted}{grey tights::claires}{shoes::fergie::famous footwear}

Happy September, by the way! I know I was complaining about it just yesterday, but I love the fall. First, all my favorite holidays are in the fall: my birthday (the 26th of this month!!), Halloween, and Thanksgiving! Plus, fall is really beautiful in Tahoe. I love the changing leaves on the aspens, the delicate patterns the morning frosts make on my windows, the anticipation of school starting...it's all so electric with change. We're still supposed to have a few more weeks of warm, summery weather, but September is officially autumn to me.

Heres a lovely song about the fall by the marvelously shmexy Paolo Nutini. Can I have him for my birthday??

it looks like a rather blustery day

To call yesterday "a rather blustery day" is actually a huge understatement. It was crazy windy out! And cold, too! Fall, it seems, has set in with a vengeance here. And here I thought I was so ready for autumn and all the layering I'm all stocked up to do. But as soon as the temperature dropped I was all "Hell-to-the-NO!" Just a few more weeks of summer! Please! I still need a few more trips to the beach, just a couple more BBQ's and long, leisurely longboard rides around town! I love me some tights and cardigans, but, damn if I'm gonna miss those long, sun drenched days at the beach. It's supposed to warm up for the next few weeks, but I'm not sure if I believe it. Even the aspen trees have already started turning yellow at the tops in response to the sudden temperature change.

It was so windy when I headed out to take these pictures before work. I thought for sure every frame would be of me battling my hair and trying not to get blown over, but this little meadow at the base of Heavenly was so well shielded by the mountain on one side and the forest on the other that it was almost peaceful. Though you could still hear the wind howling through the trees all around you.

This outfit (excluding the shoes, which you can't see, so they don't count) is entirely thrifted. The skirt was found at the goodwill down the hill from South Lake, in Carson (along with a bunch of other awesome stuff). I love the elaborate tapestry print. My friend Jess was with me when I found it and told me it looked like it had begun it's life as someones curtains. So I bought it. And the top was found at the local thrift store, the Attic. The colors all off on this, mainly because I STILL cannot figure my camera out. Jeeze, I'm pathetic. But it's this lovely cream color with pretty flower detailing and cutouts. It goes with absolutely everything and is so soft and comfy. Heres a a detail shot. Excuse the errant hair. The necklace I've had for ages and I usually wear it longer, but I doubled it up this time to go with this tops neckline better.

Missing the summer,

L.